T Nation

A Frickin Lack Of Chivalry

The new ones. They traded in their clunky shoes for non-naturally colored hair. Usually bright red, green, or blue.

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Saw a relevant article here on t-nation just now by Chris Shugart and it’s so relevant to this thread:

one part copied here*
It wasn’t too long ago that being tough and mentally strong were considered desirable traits. The last thing a man wanted to be called was a wimp, a weenie, weak, or lazy. Where has that gone? Why do people choose to wallow in their weaknesses instead of overcoming them (which they’re very capable of doing)?


Chris goes on to finish the article very well and I sense encouragement in it for men to be men. Bravo.

IMO, wimpy men procreating creates a sad cycle. First off, I personally can’t determine why a woman would let one get near her, much less impregnate her.
Second, when a wimpy dude has a child, the child is at risk of learning to be wimpy, and the cycle continues.

So if just one generation could stop their own “wimpy,” our world would be better today and the future would look brighter.

What about the heroes for kids? Mine were John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, and Supermán. What are they nowadays? My kids are grown so I’ve no clue who younguns idolize in shows, but strong and tough really need to be the new fad that takes back over as standard apparel for men (dammit).

~asylum director signing off…

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I’m 22. I’m not really the most polished guy, have history in organized crime, done time in jail etc (not proud of these things anymore, I’ve totally changed my life!), but I have always been a gentleman to ladies.

I Don’t know how guys can think being anything but is a good idea. I treat all woman with respect and like gold, and it has always worked very well for me. My mother was a big advocator of equality and she raised me alone, which probably has a lot to do with it. I think MOST Girls deserve a lot better than they are getting nowadays, it’s a REAL SHAME what most girls settle for in a guy.

I see some really gorgeous good girls with some real losers. I don’t mean losers as in not successful, I mean losers as in just not good people with some twisted personalities.

Couple days late, but me too.

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You’d post that on the web why? I’d think anyone who was ever involved in such would not mention it, ever, especially in such a public way. Not calling u a liar, but can you see why I question such a thing?

Aw for treating ladies like a gentleman should-good job. Teach your sons to do it as well.

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History is the key word. I live a legal and clean life now. I’ve also done time already etc so there is no harm in discussing such things that are already over and done with. Not something I Would ever have talked about at the time though…

Not something I am proud of either, but I am not ashamed to talk about my past either, I grew up with addicts as parents and had a hard childhood so I did what I thought was best for myself with hopes of a different life for my eventual family!

I know most people would probably keep that to themselves, I guess I’m not most people though. I’ve lived a very unique life and have a lot of unique experiences that I guess i’m not afraid to share. ALTHOUGH Sharing these kind of things on this forum has ONLY come back to bite me in the ass, a lot of negativity around here. I’m not talking about you, your question did not offend me and seems based in curiosity, unlike some that seem like they are only asked with the intent to hate.

Hey, your transparency about the past is your call.

This may stem from the “false feminism” movement. I know there’s a good amount of women who actively try to subjugate men, at work and outside of it. E.g. they are offended that a man would think they “need” the door to be held. Almost like they are upset that they would have to compromise with someone in a relationship. Maybe it all stems from the recent trend toward rejecting community in favor of the individual. I seem to recall an article that references research done that resulted in strong evidence that the lack of community is bad for people, mentally, physically, etc.

I guess they ask for it and in a large enough number it becomes the perceived voice of the majority. Is it a shame? Probably but if they ask for it, it will eventually be self-fulfilled. This is just my observation and I could be wrong.

I tend to agree it stems from individualism. We’re communal creatures by nature, so that shit just throws a wrench in the works.

BTW, it’s also a tenet of Satanism that an individual is their own god (the individual thing).

But when it comes down to it, men and women compliment each other, which leads into parents and children doing the same, and THAT multiplying exponentially into a large community, even a worldwide one. Thing about that is that even the closest of families disagree, and very large ones can be split into cliques just like society as a whole.

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Don’t even get me started on the false feminism thing, you are totally right though! There are girls like that and I absolutely can not stand them.

I don’t meet many girls like this at all though, its mainly something I hear about and see through media and TV.

Perhaps this attitude with females is more prevalent in big cities like new York etc, this is my guess. I live in a small city and 80% of girls here are great, albeit lots of young girls are alcoholics which I hate so I tend to go for girls in the 28-34 age group even though I’m only 22, because I’m really not the “party” or “club” type!

I know. I was expecting more maturity in general though and less judgemental comments such as “I Would expect such stupidity from a heroin addict” etc, really comments like that are SO un called for!

I’m learning to just ignore people like that though! I’m newer to communicating anonymously online, and I’m learning that people are MUCH different in what they are willing to say online than in person!

Nobody judged you for being a heroin addict. You were judged by your actions. And the word “stupidity” was never used, nor was it ever implied. Go ahead and quote the exact quote if you want to dispute this.

Apologies for the derail. I think I have an answer for this which I will do so later.

As for hero… it was Charles Frikin’ Bronson!

Oops I missed him and agree!

As for the women who act like that, I agree it’s probably mostly in cities like NYC & LA. Then there’s San Fransissico where dudes look like ladies. Reminds me that Crocodile Dundee learned how to verify that shit!

Anyway, I’d say the majority of women over 25 do conduct themselves as ladies and aren’t all “I’m equal but in charge’.” Am quite glad I’m not in the dating market cause it’s frickin scary just to think about! So this old dude will just continue to observe and point out “how WE used to…”. Age does have that advantage:)

Yikes! You have an awfully naive perception of what it’s like as a young man on the dating scene in SF, or LA, or Seattle.

If you get confused by the dating scene, you’d also get confused by doorknobs and stairs.

Don’t believe the hype. The very rare exception is not the rule.

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Naive perhaps, due to being from the Midwest and having a strong aversion to big cities in general. Almost all I know about them is second hand, except NYC.

I’d not be confused, but would be apprehensive as hell.
Then there’s all the online stuff with which I’ve zero experience and wouldn’t be interested in using. Call me old fashioned, but if i were in the market for a lady, I’d want to meet them in person first, then maybe communicate digitally, not vice versa.

My silly ass son has met two women online who turned out to be losers. He’s divorced from the first and last I knew of the second she was in a mental ward while I was at the hospital making him get the hell out. U can’t really know someone well from just online interactions (“catfish” anyone?).

I dunno, but sometimes I feel guts like me are anachronistic in the dating world. Thank God I’m married and will never have to deal with it.

That’s why you just use the dating app to to get a first date, not use it to date someone. Makes it easy to go grab a drink with a couple of good looking women a week without having to go out of your way trying to meet them in the first place. Then when you find one you jive with, you start the traditional dating process.

Sounds like your son is doing it wrong. And you are really blaming his two failed marriages on how he met the women, and not on his bad decision making for the years after that when they were dating? Lol

Why would you be apprehensive about dating these days? Specifically?

  1. You never can REALLY know another person until you’ve lived with them for a long while, and even that’s not a guarantee.
    , leading to disappointments from women with different values and standards of conduct.

  2. I’m too frickin old to play games

  3. Hardly any woman would be as forthcoming as me about anything (see 1-3)

  1. agreed. But sometimes I do miss the excitement and novelty of meeting and experiencing a new romantic partner. The novelty is something I sometimes miss.

  2. what games? Lol. People only play games if you let em. Ain’t that hard to not play along.

  3. if upfront, blunt honesty is your thing, sure that’s hard to find but not terribly difficult. Especially in the age of empowered women where meekness is not in fashion. And just because a lady isn’t a 100% keeper doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy each other’s company for a while, ya know?

Not speaking to you directly, but I just find it real off-putting when an inexperienced person judges an entire demographic as one, instead of judging the individual. Jokes with no Ill intent or basis are one thing, but perpetuating negative mass stereotypes rubs me the wrong way.