7 Jerks You Meet in Every Gym - cracked.com

WP1 2012-01-14 23:36:49 UTC #1

"The big problem with these guys is the intimidation factor. Whether they do it deliberately or accidentally, Weight Belt Guys make going to the gym even more humiliating than it already is. When a Weight Belt Guy does something with one arm that you'd been struggling to do with both legs, you're going to feel like a piece of shit. A small, weakly built piece of shit."

MattyXL 2012-01-15 00:37:34 UTC #2

Weight Belt Guys, using complicated words like "isometric" or "set." But they will sometimes show up in regular-person gyms, which is where you'll learn to fear them.

LOL...

Though the weight belt guy who has his weight belt on for everything including db curlz is a totall asshat

I might be the sweaty guy.

Bambi 2012-01-15 01:23:39 UTC #3

the butthurt is strong in the comments

Nards 2012-01-15 03:44:22 UTC #4

I'm the sweaty guy.

shadylow 2012-01-15 04:06:49 UTC #5

Living in San Francisco; it is extremely difficult to avoid the tight shorts guys.

KrohDaddi 2012-01-15 06:15:22 UTC #6

they forgot '2-inch range-of-motion guy'

KrohDaddi 2012-01-15 06:26:03 UTC #7

in the comments: guy who is proud to avoid these douchebags because he gets all the exercise he needs by walking

this guy

KrohDaddi 2012-01-15 06:28:59 UTC #8

'unsolicited advice'
that one cuts both ways though
watch someone run straight at a brick wall and let them hurt themselves in a way you foresee?
"why didn't someone tell me?"

system 2012-01-15 18:50:22 UTC #9

People have time to check out what other people are doing/wearing at the gym? Seriously? I'm there for myself and no one else I don't pay attention I want to work out and improve. Of course as far as the person who goes around giving advice he's easy to deal with just ignore him/her/it and they'll go away.

Jeffrey_of_Troy 2012-01-15 19:01:59 UTC #10

"The hardest way to deal with a Grunter is to train a bird to fly into his mouth when he's exhaling. There may be other methods in between the two extremes, but they are not worth pursuing."

Professor_X 2012-01-15 19:11:35 UTC #11

I don't think the people staring at everybody else are there for any other reason than to stare at every body else.

I think they are the same people who spend more time in the locker room than they do working out.

What else is there to do when you are really self conscious but to point out what's wrong with everyone but you.

Grimlorn 2012-01-15 19:51:59 UTC #12

Is it ok to stare and smile when you see a guy on the squat rack curling and grunting/moaning like a guy getting fucked in the ass? Cuz I'm definitely guilty of that. Kind of wish I had my phone on me to video tape and post it.

Blackaggar 2012-01-15 20:38:58 UTC #13

The starrer is the most common i think

HoustonGuy 2012-01-15 22:05:10 UTC #14

Leaky Satan right here.

QuadasarusFlex 2012-01-16 03:26:47 UTC #15

Apparently there is no such thing as a "normal" person at the gym according to that article. Wheres the "Shut up and Lift weights and get the fuck out of there and not talk to anybody" guy?

spar4tee 2012-01-16 08:48:09 UTC #16

He found a real gym

PGA 2012-01-16 13:48:58 UTC #17

They forgot the obnoxious loud guy. Not the grunter but the guy so loud during a normal conversation you can hear him at the opposite side of the room while you have your headphones on. And he talks all...the...time.

Adzo 2012-01-17 13:15:10 UTC #18

They forgot the Reflectomorph. The painfully skinny guy who finishes his set of squat rack curls then stands between you and the mirror to inspect his abs. He then squeezes out 3 chins, resumes his position in front of the mirror to check if his abs are still there. Rinse, repeat.

Nards 2012-01-17 13:40:09 UTC #19

Yeah, there's this one guy at my gym that paces between two of the wall mirrors looking like he wants to fight himself, meaning that he's got that stupid "gym face" the whole time he's staring at himself.

BlueCollarTr8n 2012-01-17 17:05:06 UTC #20

Are you guy in the squat rack or the guy doing the smiling? Or are you smiling at yourself in the mirror while curling in the squat rack?