6 Unwritten Rules of the Gym

fair enough, I misjudged you and I apologise

1 Like

Hey no worries bro :slight_smile:

My most annoying example:

A regular super-obnoxious personal trainer at the gym, who just happens to have ridiculously annoying curly hair (we call her Goldilocks), often takes up limited benches by placing towels and water bottles on them (often more than one bench), and does this all under the one and only pull-up bar (without even using the pull-up bar), while she makes her clients do aerobics a few meters away in the designated free weights area (instead of the massive room next door that is designated for cardio, aerobics, stretching etc).

And did I mention her ridiculous curly hairstyle…


1 Like

Haha there is always a seemingly empty and unused piece that you walk up to and out of nowhere will emerge someone who will tell you they are using it and you can’t work in because they are doing a circuit.

You’ll do something else and it won’t be used the entire time. When they get to it, it will be something like doing crunches in the power rack.

1 Like

Also, why are people doing deadlifts inside power racks these days? I’ve seen it like 3 times this month…

seeing as this thread is turning into stories of weird gym behaviour, I’ll share:

So I walk into the changing room the other day, and there’s a guy sitting on a bench getting dressed. Nothing particularly out of the ordinary there, but this guy was dressing in a way I’d never seen before.

He’s got his shoes, jeans and underwear on, but has neglected to pull up his trousers/underwear. He’s just sitting on the bench with his pants round his ankles, bare-assed like he was taking a shit, and he’s dressing his top half. So instead of pulling up his drawers, he’s putting on his shirt, jacket, etc.

Weirdest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Who begins to dress their lower half, then stops and dresses their top half while they sit there ass and dong-out on the bench?

I’m never sitting on that bench again, that’s for sure.

1 Like

Shouldn’t have to.

I have guys do this all the time and after the first time, when I get the dumbbells I need, they move back to where they were and act mildly surprised that in a minute or so I’ll be back again to put them away. Yeah, fuck me, right?

Reminds me of the guys who drop their pants down to their ankles when taking a leak at the urinal. Or the ones who drop the pants and the jocks.

Makes me believe the only thing that is preventing the fully starkers piss is that these bastards go in the shower.

Yeah…people that feel they need a bench for their water bottle because the floor’s dirty but benches have sweaty asses over them all day. Idiots.

1 Like

or the people who put those manky, sweaty little blue mats on the gym floor to do their stretches or whatever because they think it’ll be cleaner than the gym floor.

or the dudes who go barefoot into the gents. Eeewwww

You guys are weird. Why?

Yeh, I walk into the locker room and this (60+ year old( dude is standing in front of a mirror naked, has a towel he’s flapping in front of himself while facing the mirror. I managed to be quiet but there was a “what the hell are you doing?!” on the tip of my tongue.
I can’t figure out why bros don’t cover themselves after a shower and walk into the locker area. Then the towel flapping thing must’ve been some kind of ritual he does at home. I reeeeeally wanted to ask if he was off his meds.
Fortunately, self-control got the better of my mouth for a change :wink:

Truly what I’d like to know is if the ladies locker room has such antics. I’d assume they’re more reserved but sure as hell ain’t going in to check lol.

Women are disgusting! And stupid! OMG, I hate them. YUCK.

Men, on the other hand…


I would rather make friends than enemies at the gym, and try to maintain a smile on my face no matter how challenging my workout gets, or how thoughtless some of my fellow gymrats get. Despite my gym being massive (50,000 square ft) it is packed butts to nuts around the clock. Law of averages dictates that with this number of people that there’s bound to be a load of strange and bad behavior to experience.

  1. Snagging weight off my rack without asking. We have no shortage of plates in the free weight area. Even if both leg presses are being maxed out by douchebag ego lifters, there’s always plates available. In fact we have an over-supply of 25’s. I figure someone lifting plates off my rack instead of the fully stocked tree 10 feet away is just lazy or a passive-aggressive twat.

  2. The trend of bootylicious complexes. I know they’re trying to make the world more beautiful…and I appreciate that…but occupying a precious rack for an hour to do 100 squats, 10 sets of front squats, 10 sets of DL’s, a bunch of SLDL, then some lunges for good measure, with nothing more than nickels on your bar is thoughtless.

  3. Couples. Sometimes it works, but mostly not. Maybe if they spent the time loading and unloading the bar efficiently instead of yakking or staring at phones it might not be such a big deal, but taking a four minute rest…then taking or adding the 200 pound difference to the bar is too time consuming for those of us waiting for a rack. I witnessed one couple resetting the j-hooks between each set.

  4. Using equipment for something it wasn’t intended. We have really only 2 dip stations, which are the assisted dip/pull-up machines (there are a bunch of racks for pullups if you can get around the cable units). Some ladies have been using these as some sort of bizarre standing single leg press machine (of which we have at least a dozen legitimate ones for them to properly use).

I think having a severely impacted facility magnifies some of these offenses, so I try to be all-forgiving …except for the shitheads who snag weights off my rack -they can go to hell.


The video clip is priceless!

Encountered someone acting very nice at the gym today, but it’s not the one I’d been going to. Dude and his bro had been doing dumbbell curls while I did presses. I walk to the opposite side of the room and was doing scrape the rack presses, just past a fly cable setup. So dude was going to use the cables, but came all the way to the rack and asks, “Are you using this?” I about fell over from the surprise. He must’ve assumed since I had been doing DB Bench that I HAD to be going to fly’s next even though I was in the rack.
Of course I immediately thought about this thread…

Now, I have to respond to: [quote=“EmilyQ, post:34, topic:232218”]
Women are disgusting! And stupid! OMG, I hate them. YUCK.
Am assuming that was all said facetiously, but:
I love women. They’re smart, have better dexterity, and can out multi-task us guys any day.
I especially like the dexterity combined with multitasking in certain marital situations!

Only the ones who have ugly mouths can properly elicit a “yuck” from me. Further, manners of Southern ladies are just hot! I was in Kentucky (almost South) not long ago and I swear every woman with whom I interacted in the least called me “honey” or “sugar” at least every other sentence. And that accent Oh My GOD!

1 Like


It does, and that’s exactly where the men are separated from the boys.
Intestinal Fortitude needs exercise too :wink:



Concern over injury when putting plates away after lifting is like concern over carbs in an apple after you eat a box of dounuts.

Seriously though, I’ve heard the best way to avoid concerns over this type of injury is to be less of a complete pansy.



1 Like