training first, personal reflections of some personal stress at the bottom:
well, i currently have a small pain in my elbow. it actually happened squatting the other night, as i took that 365lb single before the 405lb. as i unracked the 365, i got a sharp pain in my left elbow area. im not sure exactly what happened, perhaps i unintentionally pushed up a little bit when i was taking it out of the rack?
anyway, didnt make for a great military press day. it was a dull ache yesterday, wrapped it with an ace at work off and on throughout the day, the compression and warm seemed to keep the ache away. today it felt pretty good at work, flexing and extending my arm trying to put it through a range of motion to note discomfort. felt pretty good.
the pressing actually even went ok:
5/3/1 day (75,85,95%)
150 x 5
170 x 3
190 x 6
but after the pressing my intention was to do 5 sets of dips with a 45lb on the dip belt, supersetted with 5 sets of supinated barbell rows. as i set up to dip, my left tricep just felt very weak, so i slowly lowered myself into the first rep and i could feel that i had no strength in the tricep, so i cut the dips.
did my barbell rows, then i decided to finish the lats with a few sets of "standing cable straight arm pulldowns" i forget what the hell to call them, but a pullover only standing with a cable machine. i wasnt going super heavy on these, but at the end of each set there was a sharp pain when i let go of the bar.
so, a small set back. ive had this happen before, i dont know what the fuck it is, it's annoying, but it's usually fine within a week or two. i went to the doctor's office to get it checked out a few years ago, must have been the first time it happened, and they werent able to tell me anything, found nothing wrong, and essentially just told me not to lift heavy. fuck that. that will always be the doctor's answer for injuries/pains brought about by lifting heavy.
go to a doctor and tell them it hurts when you breathe, and they damn sure will figure something out, or at least attempt to. other than during a bad doc's office joke, they wont tell you to stop breathing. however, go in with an injury sustained from lifting, and you better believe that jackass will tell you to stop lifting. oh well. not an option, ill figure it out.
instead of deadlifting on friday like i planned, ill take an extra day, deadlift on saturday, and then bench on monday if this hasnt gotten worse. im hoping it will simply get better, but my plan if it AT LEAST hasnt gotten worse is to still bench, but not go all out for the reps on that last set, just get the prescribed and get out.
long winded, but who gives a shit?
took Dave Tate's "Under the Bar" to work with me today. without going into real specifics, i work at the U.S. Capitol in a "team" environment. a couple people in the team are not really being team players, and everyone else has been getting pretty pissed off about it. the past couple weeks have been especially miserable, as it has just been constant complaining, gossip, tattle-tail bullshit. its been getting worse, but i suppose i feel like the last two weeks i just broke, and gave into all the BS, got in on the shit-talking, etc.
anyway, enter "Under the Bar". i bought and read this book originally a few months ago, and remembered that it was very thought provoking for me. its a quick read, but there are several points throughout the book where something would hit me deep, i would close the book and just think about it for a while. anyway, i may just keep bringing this book with me to work. This job isnt something i plan to stay at forever, hopefully not more than another year, and i think having this book with me every day MIGHT just be that little extra that i need, to help me stay positive. i know it worked today. when the shit talking started several times, i just told people that i wasnt getting into it, that i had a new outlook, etc. in fact, at one point several people were ganging up gossipping, and trying to get me into it. i put a big ridiculous grin on my face and just kept saying to them "turn your frown upside down!" which im sure was annoying and/or cheesy, but oh well!
i am hoping to accomplish something that Dave talks about in the book, which is essentially have my attitude rub off on them. i know that i have the ability to lead, sometimes directly, and other times more indirectly, simply with my actions instead of words, and that is my plan here. even if i fail at that, i will remain positive in my own thoughts.
a quote taken from the book that really helped me out today:
"If you are not where you'd like to be--or at least on your way--then the first place to look is attitude. The most important thing to keep in mind is that YOU choose your attitude in response to any given situation."
im sure this will take on even more meaning for me later, but right now it mainly hits on my overall situation, and the specific situation at work. i am not where i want to be, as far as my job. my goal is federal law enforcement, at a high level of training. right now i work amongst federal leo's, but im not yet one. my job is boring, and sometimes i dwell on that. sometimes i cant imagine staying there for the next 6-8 months, at least, that i will likely be there. my attitude in this regard is poor. i could have it much worse. at least i have a job, i get paid well, i am safe, i have my health, etc, etc, etc...the negative thinking has allowed me to be what i despise- an LPAB. Little Pussy Ass Bitch. fuck that.
the quote then hits on the specific situation with the shit talking at work, because as i said earlier, i let it get in my head, and bring me to negative town. well negative town is not a place i like to be, so im done with going there. all these other dipshits at work can get on board with me to positive island, or they can miss the fucking boat!